Cómo dejar de pensar demasiado

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Hello everyone and welcome to ideas for
a better life. I am Eugenio Valla,

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ruiz, reader, hardworking and lover
of personal development, as always reminding

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you that you have at your disposal
a compilation of the most relevant ideas and

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advice on personal development. In my
four books you already know them free,

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healthy and happy, thirty- one
days to improve your life, minimalism for

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normal people and seven steps for a
purposeful life. I leave your link in

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the episode notes a little lower than
the play button and also, as many

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of you are asking me how and
where to train personal development. I tell

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you what has worked for me,
which is the personal development master' s

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degree online, from IPP' s
Institute of Positive Thinking. You know that

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I think it is the best training
that exists in this field, because it

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covers depth the six main areas of
life, self- knowledge, body and

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health, emotions, relationships, transcendence
and money and professional career. So,

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if you want to take a look
at your completely free and uncompromising master clash,

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I' ll leave your link in
the episode notes a little lower than

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the play button next to my books. In a world as complex as the

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present one, there are times when
our brain becomes out of control and when

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our brain is controlled, it can
turn a senseless grain of sand into an

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authentic mountain. It is clear and
I agree that thinking long before making any

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important decision in life is fundamental.
Obviously, it is worth taking some time

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to reflect and reflect a lot on
decisions as important as the career I want

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to study whether or not I have
to end a relationship that is not going

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well if I am going to move
to another country or not. But what

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I want to refer to in this
episode is not that kind of decision.

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I am referring to those occasions when
you give us too much thought to things

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that don' t deserve it.
And this is a problem, because when

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we do this, we are misallocating
our cognitive resources instead of using our mental

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energy, which is something limited to
important issues and which really need that energy.

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We' re wasting it on things
that don' t deserve it and

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thinking too much can manifest itself in
various ways for everyone is the same.

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There is a first form, which
is the most common, which is ruminating,

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which is what happens to us when
we stay awake at night repeating something

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unimportant that has happened to us during
the day, like that a colleague has

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commented on what and has left us
wrong in front of the boss, or

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when we become obsessed with matters that
do not have as much importance as that

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little reform that needs to be done
at home, or that problem that we

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have had with the car, etcetera. These kinds of thoughts occupy an impressive

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amount of our brain space. They
consume an impressive amount of energy. As

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I say, that' s the
most common way to think too much of

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that rumiation. And then there are
people who think too much out of indecision

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people who constantly doubt the daily decisions
they have to make, who ask themselves

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many times if it is worth buying
that and giving it a thousand turns,

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if you think about what other people
think about it. The site has to

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accept that invitation, because if it' s not going to seem rude,

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normally, this constant indecision is because
we' re not clear what our values

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are. We do not have a
constitution, reactor values that lead us to

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make decisions in a simpler way.
And what happens is that when we think

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too much, we' re going
into a very important opportunity cost, because

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think that your mental energy is limited
is something finite, it' s not

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infinite. So, every moment you
spend overthinking, it' s taking time

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that you could have spent doing something
constructive. So if you think about it,

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not too much, but if you
think about it, overthinking is a

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missed opportunity to live a better life, and that' s why I want

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to address this issue today. Today' s idea is that you focus on

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thinking about what really matters and so
you can do it, I want to

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share a number of tips, a
series of ideas that can help you.

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The first is, as almost always, to become aware. If you want

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to fight the excess of thought you
have, it is essential that you know

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how to recognize when you are falling
into it. And to do that,

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you' re going to need to
observe yourself continuously, be attentive, be

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present. How can you realize that
you are thinking too much, because one

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of the signs that they will tell
you is when you fall into that situation

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of paralysis by analysis, when you
feel trapped in a cycle of constant thought,

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but that does not help you to
come to any conclusions. And as

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a result of this, because you
feel indecisive, you feel they are and

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that you are constantly and continuously reviewing
the same information and falling into this.

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What it' s going to do
is you exhaust your mental energy, stress

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yourself, and don' t make
the right choices. You probably don'

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t make any decisions, but when
you make it, you don' t

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have much more chance of being right
than wrong. People who think too often

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believe that there is only one right
answer to problems. They are some sort

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of perfectionists who idealize in an unrealistic
way the world around them. No perfect

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solutions are a myth. Most problems
do not have only one solution. They

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have several good solutions. The problem
is that if you think there' s

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only one right solution to your problem, you' re going to spend a

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lot or time, to collect more
and more data, more and more information,

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you' re going to think more
and more because you think you only

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have one bullet to solve that problem
and obviously want to take advantage of it.

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If, on the contrary, you
know that there are many ways to

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solve a problem that is reality,
is reality, we are not going to

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fool ourselves. So what you do
is make a relatively quick decision and you

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' ll see if that solution that
you' ve decided to try works or

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not and if you don' t
try another saying otherwise, when you think

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this way you see those possible solutions
as hypotheses that you have to test.

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In the end, the key is
to allow yourself to fail. When you

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allow yourself to fail, you lose
the need to achieve that absolute perfection in

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each of the decisions you make.
And best of all, you start to

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see failures not as an end point, but as learning, as something that

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allows you to keep moving forward,
because in reality, many times mistakes teach

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us much more than successes. If
you are constantly tense avoiding mistakes at all

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costs, you are depriving yourself of
learning. So, instead of seeing solutions

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that don' t work as a
defeat, you' ll consider it as

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one more fact. In that wonderful
experiment that is your life, think of

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a laboratory, in experiments there are
no great expectations. An experiment focuses on

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results, not victories, because each
result, even without experiment, is not

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satisfactory. Each result is a step
forward for science or for whatever field.

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Another thing that can help you think
less is to identify your values. Every

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day we' re bombarded with thousands
of decisions. We have to make thousands

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of decisions every day. Some are
very important, like what career we have

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to study, but most are much
smaller decisions, such as that we are

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going to have dinner tonight and in
the middle of that bombing it is very

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easy to get lost thinking too much. The question is how I make such

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decisions faster and more clearly. And
here' s one thing. Many of

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the people who make good decisions.
They are people who are guided by values,

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who make decisions based on who they
are and what they care about.

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Imagine, for example, that you
have to choose a school for your child.

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Well, imagine you have to choose
a school for your son. If

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you value your time above other things, then you must choose the school that

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is closest to your home. And
this will have good things or bad things,

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because that school can be better or
worse. But in any case,

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your values, which is the protection
of your time, have made it easier

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for you to make a decision.
I don' t go into whether it

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' s right or wrong, because
that' s what we' ve already

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seen that what we might expect is
learning. But your values have allowed you

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to make a decision, so you
are already avoiding the excessive thinking that is

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what I am talking about in this
podcast. What happens is that sometimes there

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is a gap between what we say
we value and what we really value or

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what we actually do. For example, we say that we value family time,

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but we work late almost always.
Or we say culture is important to

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us, but we never take a
book. This is nothing but signs that

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we are out of line with our
values, or that we have no values

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of our own or that what we
do is not in line with those values

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that we theoretically have. So my
advice is always to ask yourself if your

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daily actions are reflecting your values.
Think about where you spend your time,

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where you invest your money, where
you invest your energy, because those investments

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often reveal your unconscious values. Tell
yourself the truth. Where your time goes,

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where your money goes, where your
energy goes, because those are your

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values and that is the truth.
Get in front of that mirror and if

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you like it, what you look
great, keep doing it. But if

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you don' t like it,
it may be time to redefine your values

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or redefine your habits. Remember,
your values are yours. They don'

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t have to be universally correct.
There are no good values and bad values,

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although culturally, because there are things
that do resonate with us more,

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but the buckets have to be right
for oneself they have to be right for

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you Once you identify those values and
start living according to them, then the

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excess of thought begins to disappear because
you already make decisions based on your values.

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You don' t have to give
things thirty laps. You have values

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and you act according to them.
Another important concept that can help you is

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to understand that you can' t
control every aspect of your life, but

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you can control your answers. You
don' t control what happens to you,

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but you control how you respond to
it. For example, there are

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two interesting derivatives here. The first
is gratitude. Gratitude is an antidote to

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overthinking, because thank you shift your
attention from what you lack to what you

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already have in your life and the
result, because it is a more optimistic

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mood and, above all, less
room for rumination, to turn things around.

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And how I begin to thank you, because one simple way to do

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this is to schedule it. You
schedule a reminder on your phone every day

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and when it sounds, you take
a minute. A minute doesn' t

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take longer to think about one or
two things you' re grateful for that

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day. And another option, because
it' s with an application. I

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have, for example, one called
Dali Gratitude, which allows you to keep

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a diary of gratitude and every day
point out three things. And it'

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s fine, because you can see
what things you' ve been thankful for

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in the last year, for example, and you can already group them by

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topic and do analysis of what things
really help you feel happy, to feel

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that gratitude. Another way to respond
to the realities of life is by cultivating

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empathy when you face annoying situations that
are inevitable in life. For example,

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a driver who jumps to a traffic
light and is about to give you and

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so do not draw negative conclusions.
Instead of thinking that guy' s an

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asshole, think of a more empathetic
explanation. Maybe that person has a medical

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emergency and has to get to the
hospital before something happens. The idea in

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the end, the idea of both
gratitude and thought is empathetic, is to

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know that you cannot have control of
the external events that happen in your life,

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but that the meaning you want to
give them is in your hands.

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Another idea to take advantage of the
small pleasures of life. Normally, people

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who think too much miss the opportunity
to taste those little pleasures simply because they

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are spinning too much and then enter
into a mentality of scarcity. A little

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pleasure doesn' t have to be
something expensive. All that matters is that

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it' s something you like.
There' ll be people who like to

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take a bath at night. Others
will like to go to the movies with

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a friend and others will like to
read a book quietly without anyone bothering them

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or going out for a run in
a park or in a forest. The

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whims are something individual These moments,
small, moments of pleasure are individual.

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But if we can create habits around
those pleasures. So we' re automating

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our well- being without even thinking
about it is the key. It'

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s just like companies. Companies want
to automate their business models. You should

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try to automate your own well-
being through habits. So, instead of

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weighing the pros and cons, taking
a bath every night or going out for

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a run every afternoon, you have
to have a pre- established philosophy that

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encourages you to enjoy that pleasure without
guilt. And for that you have to

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challenge that inner voice that' s
going to tell you that you don'

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t deserve it or that you should
be doing something else. Forget about going

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out to eat in the open air
one day anyone who makes alone wants to,

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even on a Tuesday, you have
to automate your own well- being

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back again from habits that make you
feel good without thinking too much about them.

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So you already know how to think
too much waste on your cognitive resources.

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It puts you under absolutely unnecessary stress
and complicates your life. To overcome

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that bad habit, we must first
be aware of it. Secondly, we

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need to start acting in accordance with
values. Thirdly, we have to accept

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that we can be wrong and that
if we do, we will learn from

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it. Fourth, we need to
incorporate habits that allow us to enjoy the

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small pleasures of life. And fifth, whatever happens, whatever the result,

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be always grateful for the things we
do have in our lives. If you

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liked this episode please give me like
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ipp TE. I leave your link
in the episode notes. Down there in

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the box, next to my books, and I' m just saying goodbye.

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Thank you very much, as always
and until the next ss ss ss

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ss ss s