April 16, 2024
Fernando Moraño- Fernandertal

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Comedy Central Podcast. Okay, thank
you. First of all, thank you
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all who are here tonight for your
presence and those who have not been able
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to come to thank you for your
absence, because you have to be grateful
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in this fucking world. Not how
you are moderately. I don' t
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dare make assessments about my state of
mind. I' m waiting for standard
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press make the report. You know
standard am purs in Spanish standard and purs
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is mediocre and poor. It is
as if the People' s Party,
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in a great exercise of sincerity,
were to be called the Papist and then
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not, or the Socialist Party,
for example, you are to be called
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the Party, which is parties without
ethical objectives. It wouldn' t be
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more or less similar. Not good. Seeing what my start has been,
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we' re going to take off
our masks. Friends. I am Fernando
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Moreño and I belong to the fifteen
meters of this new radical terrorist movement.
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I' m sorry, but not
on pressure. We have been linked to
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Alcaeda, the far right Spanish and
Neta. We are what is said,
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a great example of living together in
earnest. Not really. I was at
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home the other day cooking and I
heard on the radio the fifteen meters the
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puppies of ETA and I said I
was freaked out at that moment call my
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mother, because you know that mothers
as soon as there is a problem,
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there they are already. Besides,
it says what you do, son,
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and nothing, Mom that I'
m a terrorist. Says and pays well,
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I good raw, but well what
time we' re going to do
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no, and says well, son, mine And it can be what you
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' ve done to call you magazine, because you haven' t lentils,
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mom and you don' t make
lentils anymore that you' re all day
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sliding the favor, but it'
s awesome. No, but, well,
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it must be said that 15 meters
is full. It' s full.
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It is full of dangerous groups,
such as teachers, students, doctors,
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people very harmful to society, not
who are usually repressed by riot control.
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Eh I don' t know if
you know that the budget in riot
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control has multiplied only one thousand seven
hundred eighty percent, because, as we
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are in a time of austerity,
we don' t want to pass either.
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And yes, because let' s
really say they' re investing in
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a new education system because teachers open
minds, but riot control opens heads directly.
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Thought goes faster in the new fiber
optics. You know what it looks
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like. Yes, they are investing
in a new system of education, which
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is the one that says that the
letter with blood comes from all life.
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But it seems that all the jobs
promised by the People' s Party are
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going to be bad luck. Not
in that sense, because we have been
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luckier. We know that these collectives
are generally used to maintain public order.
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But since public order has been privatized
and they no longer know what they are
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defending, they are giving the right
and sinister shit and they don' t
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know anything about it. And it
makes me angry that they beat teachers to
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doctors, students, people related to
conscience, to humanity, to knowledge and,
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for example, to the coast that
is crying out for a host and
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that no one remembers it. You
know, it tastes bad, it tastes
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bad. Thank you, thank you. In any case, I mean good.
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I belong to the fifteenth, because
I am a rebel. I'
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m a rebel. I am a
rebel because the world has done this to
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me, not because no one has
treated me with love and because it gets
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out of my mind, no,
among many other things. I didn'
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t imagine if I heard rebel I
was born dead, uh, and look
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at me now what' s tampa, uh, I' m about to
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move in. Not really. I' ve overcome fivesides, the last one
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with pimple and twenty- five crustipates
that don' t kill, but bother.
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Hey, things are the way they
are and you' re gonna say
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pussy with everything that' s happened
to him, he hasn' t dropped
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his hair or anything. He'
s got great hair why. Because I
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' m a strong constitution, not
like this country. Hey, the Constitution
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is like my cousin, she doesn' t respect anyone. Thank you.
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They' ll still fucking tell you. If this guy hasn' t died
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with everything that' s happened,
he' s agreed with the devil pussy.
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The socialists or the populars don'
t agree and nothing happens. The
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other day I was reading the press
because I' m a snop. I
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will not deny it and in the
contact section I see Socialist Party. Look
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for voters. It doesn' t
matter ideology. We haven' t had
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one in a while. But,
yes, I am Satan' s son.
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I am Satan' s son,
but not because I love the person.
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I' m a charming being who
can take me wherever you want to
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see I' m a very nice
guy. The thing is, I'
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ve had bad luck. Not that
I have infinite evil within me. I
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' ve had bad luck why.
Because my mother is called Luz and my
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father Fernando and I, because I
am the son of Luz Ifer, but
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it has been bad luck. Don' t condemn me so quickly. Besides,
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I don' t believe in hell. I don' t think there
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' s any hell after this no
improvement. I don' t believe it.
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I don' t believe in paradise, as Luis Bárcenas would say.
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You know, Luis Bárcena you'
ve known in the People' s Party
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as Luis the bastard I give him. Luis, I don' t get
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it, not really, but,
well, thank you. Then there is
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the Muslim paradise or the people of
the Cuscus clan who say that in paradise
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you expect forty- seven virgins for
your marine dick you know forty- seven
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virgins. I say what a fucking
paradise you know you' re making it
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up, curate it forty- seven
sexually experienced women. That' s what
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I' m buying from you Between
you coming and not coming, they'
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re riding between them. That'
s cool. Yes, sir, it
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' s true. It' s
true, we don' t really find
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ourselves in this situation. I don' t believe in anything. I don
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' t believe in the existence of
anything. I don' t think anything
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exists. There is no God,
no God exists. Let' s see
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they say that God created the world
in seven days and the last day off
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go fucking faggot. I have turned
the seven days of the week into rest
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Who lives like God? Now,
uh, I ask, I ask,
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uh, seriously. Besides, if
God were Spanish, he would have created
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the world at the last minute and
bad he would have told him and this
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shit calatravajaaaa. And the arranged calatrava
wing is the same man who designed Holy
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Week. Because that' s very
unpleasant. I' m so sorry,
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guys with caps, others whipping each
other, and then we satanics are the
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ones who do a relaxing Santa week, people enjoy you, people look good,
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not pussy, which is that people
who have faith have to carry some
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saints who weigh 70, 000 tons. Man make some span saints because those
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people will have faith, but they
will have a back. You don'
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t know I say I' m
true some light saints that you can bring
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us in and out of the Church
several times, do procession races fucking Santadeo
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against San Nicanor with overtakings. You
know you see there' s excitement,
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they' re looking for the show. Not Easter football teams. For example,
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Real Madrid would be the official team
for Easter. They play Ramos Cristiano
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Dimoria Casillas, who is a martyr
and Florentino Pérez, who is a superior
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and good and pepe being that is
determinative. No, I wouldn' t
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miss anyone there, it wouldn'
t be okay. No, but there
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are those who look like changes in
the Church. The Church has to adapt
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to society. This new pope seems
to be changing it. Everything is very
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revolutionary. Well, maybe he'
s branding a rooster and then it'
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s all lies. But, well, looks like the guy' s got
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good intentions. Thank you. Not
really. You know the old Pope abandoned
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us, the German pastor left us. I said something about not being true.
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Now we have an Argentine Pope,
the first Argentine to claim to be
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only the Pope. No, no, no, no, no, no,
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no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
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no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
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no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
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no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This
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has never been seen before. I
really would have preferred the black pope.
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I was very of the black pope. I would have liked a black pope,
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Dominican, Puerto Rican, Cuban,
a daddy not seriously, someone who
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goes out and tells people like Jesucrista, told the people of Judea, the
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people of Judea, dog, dog
and background I like gasoline or Jesus Christ
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move hips, if you are the
king of Christians with panties. Well,
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this fantasy. I' ve already
gotten carried away. Excuse me, uh,
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excuse me In any case, a
good- looking dad. That'
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s good. Not those preachers who
go to the subway. I don'
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t know if you' ve seen
them first thing in the morning and they
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start the messiah will come down from
the sky to sow the apocalypse. You
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' ll die, preachers, one
day I approached one and you tell him
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shut up that it' s me
how to end up with a madman being
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crazier than him. You know that
works. No, but I didn'
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t come here to talk to you
about the difference between good and evil,
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because I am all adults and you
know that the difference between good and evil
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is wider with a good lawyer involved, that is to say tell Kams.
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He can explain it perfectly. Not
in that sense. No, but come
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on. I didn' t come
here to make that kind of explanation.
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I am not the son of God, I am not the son of Satan.
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I' m the crisis, I' m Cris and Chris for friends
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you thought you were going to sell
flats all your life and sons of Puta.
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You didn' t take into account
the power of Chris and I had
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to get everyone scared with how good
I was at home. But, well,
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you have to pay the mortgage,
you have to make a living.
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It' s very wrong, uh, my mother, there' s the
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depleted uranium, almost uranium mania,
yeah, really, uh that' s
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like a name of village uranium seriously. Before, they used to tell you
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a little nuclear power. It was
going well as if I were talking to
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you, I was taking you out
of the coffee. You know, but
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now, after Fukushima, no one
believes in nuclear power. Imagine that the
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next Gotzila movie is going to come
out rebuilding Japan as to where it was
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freaking out. No. It'
s a bad thing. Markets don'
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t believe in us. The other
day I went down to my fruit maker
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and told him why you didn'
t do it. This true and good
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did not answer me, but I
took a couple of beautiful onions that doesn
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' t take it away from you. Nobody. It' s a bad
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thing. It' s a very
bad thing, but don' t worry
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because in Europe, in Europe,
they' re going to rescue us.
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Europe used to bring big intellectuals like
discards and now brings others like cuts.
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Eh, yes Europe, the old
continent now known as Karrefur. They have
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decided, thank you, that the
solution to our problems is cuts. I
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have to cut my pussy, change
their handcraft, passionately paint and coloring a
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more cheerful thing. And we have
to cut back on education that' s
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gotten out of hand. And this
is the country overeducated. No, seriously,
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it' s an excess, this
is a gaffapasta logy. You know,
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no, no, really. You
don' t know. You don
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' t know how serious that is. And you put tea of five And
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it' s all about scholarship and
knowledge. Had the ninis fight like hear
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it' s called the bantista,
who' s a spiritist. Hey,
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no, fuck me. We cannot
afford all this from now on in schools.
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We' re not going to teach
kids how to write with commas points
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accents parenthesis, because that' s
a printing money you' re throwing at
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the end of the year. It' s a money you throw away because
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then they end up in whatsappc come
see, come eh ben and conjugating in
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moticonos that that' s the dicks, eh what a man and that people
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before were of numbers or letters,
but these generations of signs, that'
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s very rare. Not then,
if our children have to grow up to
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be idiots, our children grow up
to be idiots. But the square budget,
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that' s the important thing,
to square the budget, uh that
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' s and by the way,
another whim that you' ve taken the
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working class to live, that can' t be this health thing, that
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you' re all in a health
that gives you cover. From now on
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are we going to make cuts in
sanitation on October 12th? It will only
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open on the 12th of October.
Yeah, I' m sorry. If
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you go to someone else' s
hospital, then you cure a frog'
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s ass. If it doesn'
t heal today, we' ll see,
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we' ll see. Eh and
of course, if you have to
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die, you die. And if
you have to die, you die.
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But the square budget, that'
s what' s important. Cuadrate the
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budget. And you have to balance
the budget, because you have to compete
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and you have to produce. Prauthir
and competition compete and produce. It sounds
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like a fucking song from here in
Africa, sung by Hitler EP Competition and
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you produce And you have to compete
with chilos. How the fuck do you
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compete with a Chinese man a machine
programmed to smoke, spit and work?
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How do you compete with a chaino
if a cheo retires walking into the light.
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How you compete with a non-
che, how we' re going
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00:16:11.200 --> 00:16:17.799
to compete with the Chinese, with
the child unemployment in this country, children
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who don' t work, and
the Chinese over the years are already sewing
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balls. For us. We can' t afford children either if children have
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to work. The children work,
but the square budget very well. How
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quickly you understood, uh, because
this is trying to explain crack and nobody
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understands it. I' ve got
half a frightful legislature left over. I
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00:16:52.759 --> 00:16:56.960
can' t allow the children,
but neither can the elderly and the retired.
207
00:16:56.600 --> 00:17:00.879
I don' t know if there
are people here who are going to
208
00:17:00.039 --> 00:17:03.559
retire from this game or pretend to. I' m so sorry. Our
209
00:17:03.600 --> 00:17:10.680
elders are a luxury we cannot afford. I' m sorry, I'
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00:17:10.720 --> 00:17:11.079
m sorry, we' re gonna
have to talk to these people. It
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00:17:11.119 --> 00:17:15.000
' s just that I have a
lot of experience showing work. Hey what
212
00:17:15.119 --> 00:17:18.039
' s that about charging and not
working like that, you can' t
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00:17:18.039 --> 00:17:23.880
compete. Spanish retired, please leave
the world in an orderly fashion. I
214
00:17:25.079 --> 00:17:30.599
' m sorry, I' m
sorry, we' re gonna get the
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00:17:30.680 --> 00:17:33.519
windows off the Segovia bridge and get
them going. Hey, hey, hey,
216
00:17:33.759 --> 00:17:33.759
hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
217
00:17:33.759 --> 00:17:36.240
hey, hey, hey. Nice, don' t let them see suffering,
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00:17:37.759 --> 00:17:40.559
eh that they do. Like the
synchronized notation to the crazy little mermaid,
219
00:17:41.799 --> 00:17:44.799
hey, yeah, yeah, and
if there' s one alive,
220
00:17:45.000 --> 00:17:47.960
let' s ask for it with
the petanque. You know, but budget
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00:17:48.160 --> 00:18:02.519
moves great friends. Anyway. Another
of the great novelties of the neoliberal era
222
00:18:03.200 --> 00:18:07.880
is the liberal labor forgiveness reform I
am always wrong. A liberal labor pardon
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00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:18.480
reform must be made in order to
make the labour market more flexible The labour
224
00:18:18.599 --> 00:18:25.039
market must be made more flexible to
a point where unfair dismissal of a worker
225
00:18:25.279 --> 00:18:30.480
will be considered a tribute to the
worker, and so the worker will compensate
226
00:18:30.680 --> 00:18:37.359
his boss for the other whim you
have taken, so that an employee can
227
00:18:37.400 --> 00:18:42.640
be dismissed and hired several times a
day according to productivity and economic results,
228
00:18:44.240 --> 00:18:49.599
creating new methods of revolutionary layoffs,
such as comparative dismissal. You get to
229
00:18:49.680 --> 00:18:53.599
work, you get fired, and
at the exit you get hired in half
230
00:18:53.680 --> 00:18:57.880
and you go home that doesn'
t know very well what happened. It
231
00:18:59.000 --> 00:19:03.440
' s a feeling, a mez
co lance not that you liked, uh,
232
00:19:06.240 --> 00:19:11.240
you got a fired face that you
shit ca. You know that young
233
00:19:11.359 --> 00:19:18.759
people are firing meat. EH.
In any case, enough with the regrets,
234
00:19:18.119 --> 00:19:23.799
enough with the complaints. I have
the solution I could only have it.
235
00:19:23.839 --> 00:19:30.160
I' m clear. We have
to make a Spanish revolution. But
236
00:19:30.279 --> 00:19:37.119
the revolution will be sexual, or
it will be hispanish sexual revolution. Yes,
237
00:19:37.200 --> 00:19:41.359
gentlemen, we cannot compete with the
Chinese because they are professional slaves.
238
00:19:42.079 --> 00:19:45.920
We can' t compete with the
Germans because they' re real sons of
239
00:19:45.920 --> 00:19:55.480
the Great Whore. Then we have
to compete with Dominicans, who are poorer,
240
00:19:55.839 --> 00:20:00.400
but fuck more. Until when we' re gonna let my citizens go
241
00:20:00.480 --> 00:20:07.480
to bed every night without fucking.
The movement is shown by fucking, friends,
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00:20:08.799 --> 00:20:11.920
because a well- fucked Spaniard goes
better everywhere in his fucking life.
243
00:20:18.160 --> 00:20:22.519
That' s why I' m
going to found the first political party worried
244
00:20:22.559 --> 00:20:29.559
that you' re left- wing
or right- wing, you' re
245
00:20:29.559 --> 00:20:42.920
working or you' re getting fucked
well. Partido Popular bla Partido Popular nor
246
00:20:44.119 --> 00:20:48.519
a Spaniard without fucking a commitment of
everyone. I don' t want women,
247
00:20:48.960 --> 00:20:52.039
I don' t want husbands,
I don' t want lovers,
248
00:20:52.039 --> 00:20:57.680
I want militants. People who fail
for Spain, fuckers, natos who sleep
249
00:20:57.720 --> 00:21:03.960
with people more and more unpleasant than
them. These people will receive money from
250
00:21:04.079 --> 00:21:10.319
the state for personal damage and will
be considered the hero of the homeland.
251
00:21:10.480 --> 00:21:15.599
What a fucking Popular Party, not
a Spaniard without fucking everyone' s engagement.
252
00:21:15.200 --> 00:21:18.839
In the People' s Party we
are going to call general elections.
253
00:21:21.960 --> 00:21:30.559
Yes, sir We' re here. We are fully in favour of global
254
00:21:30.559 --> 00:21:37.319
warming. A Partido Popular, not
a Spaniard without fucking a commitment of everything.
255
00:21:37.680 --> 00:21:42.000
I' m worried about young people
seriously, these people who won'
256
00:21:42.039 --> 00:21:47.160
t be able to access decent housing
and they' re going to have to
257
00:21:47.279 --> 00:21:52.200
make love in a shithole or in
a room next to their parents for you
258
00:21:52.839 --> 00:22:02.400
I' m going to build follódromos. Yes, Mr Big, what buildings
259
00:22:02.519 --> 00:22:07.519
where you can fuck in the company
of all your fucking Facebook. Yes,
260
00:22:07.599 --> 00:22:11.960
friends, Popular Party, not a
Spaniard without fucking a commitment of all,
261
00:22:11.079 --> 00:22:15.480
because to fuck us between four,
let' s fuck each other man.
262
00:22:18.920 --> 00:22:27.559
Yes, Mr Popular Party, not
a Spaniard without fucking everyone' s engagement.
263
00:22:27.759 --> 00:22:33.599
You will be my excitation minister,
yes, and you will be my
264
00:22:33.759 --> 00:22:41.559
minister of making it Popular Party or
a Spaniard without fucking a commitment from everyone.
265
00:22:41.200 --> 00:22:45.319
I' m gonna fuck you all. You want to fuck me.
266
00:22:47.680 --> 00:22:52.559
That' s how I like it. Friends, there are some who believe
267
00:22:52.640 --> 00:22:56.400
that the solution to this crisis is
to give everyone a pick and a shovel
268
00:22:56.519 --> 00:23:02.759
and come and bite. I say
pussy and what miners protest. And besides,
269
00:23:02.799 --> 00:23:04.279
if we all get itchy, we' re gonna get the world to
270
00:23:04.359 --> 00:23:10.400
dismy in the middle of the universe
like an effervescent aspirin. It' s
271
00:23:10.400 --> 00:23:12.200
nothing more. And others say the
solution is to put a guillotine in the
272
00:23:12.279 --> 00:23:18.920
village squares and cut the politicians and
bankers' heads off. I can'
273
00:23:18.960 --> 00:23:22.559
t be in favor of something as
wild as the beak and the stop.
274
00:23:27.480 --> 00:23:32.039
But, my friends, don'
t lose faith. Things are fucked up
275
00:23:32.079 --> 00:23:34.680
but don' t lose faith.
The human being is wonderful. What happens
276
00:23:34.799 --> 00:23:40.000
is that you don' t notice, you notice and you' re here
277
00:23:40.079 --> 00:23:42.240
conservative, you' ve been offended. I have to tell you that I
278
00:23:42.319 --> 00:23:47.799
have things of conservative mentality that I
deeply respect. I also like to fuck
279
00:23:48.039 --> 00:23:48.680
without a condom many times
1
00:00:02.120 --> 00:00:21.719
Comedy Central Podcast. Okay, thank
you. First of all, thank you
2
00:00:21.800 --> 00:00:26.920
all who are here tonight for your
presence and those who have not been able
3
00:00:26.960 --> 00:00:31.640
to come to thank you for your
absence, because you have to be grateful
4
00:00:31.760 --> 00:00:40.320
in this fucking world. Not how
you are moderately. I don' t
5
00:00:40.320 --> 00:00:44.840
dare make assessments about my state of
mind. I' m waiting for standard
6
00:00:44.840 --> 00:00:51.280
press make the report. You know
standard am purs in Spanish standard and purs
7
00:00:51.560 --> 00:00:55.600
is mediocre and poor. It is
as if the People' s Party,
8
00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.560
in a great exercise of sincerity,
were to be called the Papist and then
9
00:01:03.079 --> 00:01:08.200
not, or the Socialist Party,
for example, you are to be called
10
00:01:08.239 --> 00:01:12.239
the Party, which is parties without
ethical objectives. It wouldn' t be
11
00:01:12.319 --> 00:01:15.319
more or less similar. Not good. Seeing what my start has been,
12
00:01:17.040 --> 00:01:19.920
we' re going to take off
our masks. Friends. I am Fernando
13
00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:26.519
Moreño and I belong to the fifteen
meters of this new radical terrorist movement.
14
00:01:26.400 --> 00:01:32.200
I' m sorry, but not
on pressure. We have been linked to
15
00:01:32.200 --> 00:01:36.280
Alcaeda, the far right Spanish and
Neta. We are what is said,
16
00:01:36.439 --> 00:01:46.000
a great example of living together in
earnest. Not really. I was at
17
00:01:46.079 --> 00:01:51.040
home the other day cooking and I
heard on the radio the fifteen meters the
18
00:01:51.200 --> 00:01:55.599
puppies of ETA and I said I
was freaked out at that moment call my
19
00:01:55.599 --> 00:01:57.640
mother, because you know that mothers
as soon as there is a problem,
20
00:01:59.719 --> 00:02:00.840
there they are already. Besides,
it says what you do, son,
21
00:02:01.040 --> 00:02:05.799
and nothing, Mom that I'
m a terrorist. Says and pays well,
22
00:02:05.840 --> 00:02:10.120
I good raw, but well what
time we' re going to do
23
00:02:12.080 --> 00:02:14.800
no, and says well, son, mine And it can be what you
24
00:02:14.800 --> 00:02:16.240
' ve done to call you magazine, because you haven' t lentils,
25
00:02:16.280 --> 00:02:22.039
mom and you don' t make
lentils anymore that you' re all day
26
00:02:22.039 --> 00:02:23.800
sliding the favor, but it'
s awesome. No, but, well,
27
00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:25.319
it must be said that 15 meters
is full. It' s full.
28
00:02:25.439 --> 00:02:30.759
It is full of dangerous groups,
such as teachers, students, doctors,
29
00:02:31.039 --> 00:02:37.280
people very harmful to society, not
who are usually repressed by riot control.
30
00:02:39.639 --> 00:02:45.919
Eh I don' t know if
you know that the budget in riot
31
00:02:46.319 --> 00:02:50.280
control has multiplied only one thousand seven
hundred eighty percent, because, as we
32
00:02:50.280 --> 00:02:51.520
are in a time of austerity,
we don' t want to pass either.
33
00:02:53.560 --> 00:02:58.360
And yes, because let' s
really say they' re investing in
34
00:02:58.400 --> 00:03:04.039
a new education system because teachers open
minds, but riot control opens heads directly.
35
00:03:05.159 --> 00:03:09.039
Thought goes faster in the new fiber
optics. You know what it looks
36
00:03:09.080 --> 00:03:16.360
like. Yes, they are investing
in a new system of education, which
37
00:03:16.400 --> 00:03:22.479
is the one that says that the
letter with blood comes from all life.
38
00:03:22.560 --> 00:03:25.599
But it seems that all the jobs
promised by the People' s Party are
39
00:03:25.680 --> 00:03:31.639
going to be bad luck. Not
in that sense, because we have been
40
00:03:31.680 --> 00:03:37.759
luckier. We know that these collectives
are generally used to maintain public order.
41
00:03:38.360 --> 00:03:40.960
But since public order has been privatized
and they no longer know what they are
42
00:03:40.960 --> 00:03:46.159
defending, they are giving the right
and sinister shit and they don' t
43
00:03:46.159 --> 00:03:49.360
know anything about it. And it
makes me angry that they beat teachers to
44
00:03:49.360 --> 00:03:53.639
doctors, students, people related to
conscience, to humanity, to knowledge and,
45
00:03:53.879 --> 00:03:58.120
for example, to the coast that
is crying out for a host and
46
00:03:58.120 --> 00:04:02.479
that no one remembers it. You
know, it tastes bad, it tastes
47
00:04:02.479 --> 00:04:11.319
bad. Thank you, thank you. In any case, I mean good.
48
00:04:11.960 --> 00:04:15.759
I belong to the fifteenth, because
I am a rebel. I'
49
00:04:15.800 --> 00:04:17.560
m a rebel. I am a
rebel because the world has done this to
50
00:04:17.639 --> 00:04:21.839
me, not because no one has
treated me with love and because it gets
51
00:04:21.839 --> 00:04:25.279
out of my mind, no,
among many other things. I didn'
52
00:04:25.319 --> 00:04:29.600
t imagine if I heard rebel I
was born dead, uh, and look
53
00:04:29.720 --> 00:04:30.680
at me now what' s tampa, uh, I' m about to
54
00:04:30.680 --> 00:04:36.680
move in. Not really. I' ve overcome fivesides, the last one
55
00:04:36.720 --> 00:04:39.839
with pimple and twenty- five crustipates
that don' t kill, but bother.
56
00:04:39.879 --> 00:04:42.560
Hey, things are the way they
are and you' re gonna say
57
00:04:42.600 --> 00:04:44.240
pussy with everything that' s happened
to him, he hasn' t dropped
58
00:04:44.240 --> 00:04:46.000
his hair or anything. He'
s got great hair why. Because I
59
00:04:46.040 --> 00:04:51.319
' m a strong constitution, not
like this country. Hey, the Constitution
60
00:04:51.399 --> 00:05:00.560
is like my cousin, she doesn' t respect anyone. Thank you.
61
00:05:00.680 --> 00:05:03.160
They' ll still fucking tell you. If this guy hasn' t died
62
00:05:03.240 --> 00:05:06.680
with everything that' s happened,
he' s agreed with the devil pussy.
63
00:05:06.680 --> 00:05:11.600
The socialists or the populars don'
t agree and nothing happens. The
64
00:05:11.680 --> 00:05:14.519
other day I was reading the press
because I' m a snop. I
65
00:05:14.600 --> 00:05:19.040
will not deny it and in the
contact section I see Socialist Party. Look
66
00:05:19.160 --> 00:05:23.199
for voters. It doesn' t
matter ideology. We haven' t had
67
00:05:23.279 --> 00:05:28.079
one in a while. But,
yes, I am Satan' s son.
68
00:05:28.279 --> 00:05:30.800
I am Satan' s son,
but not because I love the person.
69
00:05:30.199 --> 00:05:33.160
I' m a charming being who
can take me wherever you want to
70
00:05:33.639 --> 00:05:35.240
see I' m a very nice
guy. The thing is, I'
71
00:05:35.279 --> 00:05:40.120
ve had bad luck. Not that
I have infinite evil within me. I
72
00:05:40.240 --> 00:05:43.759
' ve had bad luck why.
Because my mother is called Luz and my
73
00:05:43.759 --> 00:05:46.079
father Fernando and I, because I
am the son of Luz Ifer, but
74
00:05:46.120 --> 00:05:54.959
it has been bad luck. Don' t condemn me so quickly. Besides,
75
00:05:55.079 --> 00:05:58.319
I don' t believe in hell. I don' t think there
76
00:05:58.360 --> 00:06:00.319
' s any hell after this no
improvement. I don' t believe it.
77
00:06:00.399 --> 00:06:05.040
I don' t believe in paradise, as Luis Bárcenas would say.
78
00:06:05.279 --> 00:06:11.560
You know, Luis Bárcena you'
ve known in the People' s Party
79
00:06:12.680 --> 00:06:15.399
as Luis the bastard I give him. Luis, I don' t get
80
00:06:15.600 --> 00:06:24.199
it, not really, but,
well, thank you. Then there is
81
00:06:24.279 --> 00:06:30.160
the Muslim paradise or the people of
the Cuscus clan who say that in paradise
82
00:06:30.240 --> 00:06:36.000
you expect forty- seven virgins for
your marine dick you know forty- seven
83
00:06:36.199 --> 00:06:41.519
virgins. I say what a fucking
paradise you know you' re making it
84
00:06:41.720 --> 00:06:46.759
up, curate it forty- seven
sexually experienced women. That' s what
85
00:06:46.879 --> 00:06:49.759
I' m buying from you Between
you coming and not coming, they'
86
00:06:49.759 --> 00:06:54.560
re riding between them. That'
s cool. Yes, sir, it
87
00:06:54.560 --> 00:07:03.120
' s true. It' s
true, we don' t really find
88
00:07:03.120 --> 00:07:04.519
ourselves in this situation. I don' t believe in anything. I don
89
00:07:04.560 --> 00:07:06.959
' t believe in the existence of
anything. I don' t think anything
90
00:07:06.959 --> 00:07:11.240
exists. There is no God,
no God exists. Let' s see
91
00:07:11.600 --> 00:07:15.079
they say that God created the world
in seven days and the last day off
92
00:07:15.160 --> 00:07:20.319
go fucking faggot. I have turned
the seven days of the week into rest
93
00:07:20.439 --> 00:07:25.759
Who lives like God? Now,
uh, I ask, I ask,
94
00:07:26.160 --> 00:07:31.240
uh, seriously. Besides, if
God were Spanish, he would have created
95
00:07:31.279 --> 00:07:38.920
the world at the last minute and
bad he would have told him and this
96
00:07:38.920 --> 00:07:46.600
shit calatravajaaaa. And the arranged calatrava
wing is the same man who designed Holy
97
00:07:46.639 --> 00:07:51.000
Week. Because that' s very
unpleasant. I' m so sorry,
98
00:07:51.199 --> 00:07:58.560
guys with caps, others whipping each
other, and then we satanics are the
99
00:07:58.680 --> 00:08:01.839
ones who do a relaxing Santa week, people enjoy you, people look good,
100
00:08:03.720 --> 00:08:05.040
not pussy, which is that people
who have faith have to carry some
101
00:08:05.160 --> 00:08:09.240
saints who weigh 70, 000 tons. Man make some span saints because those
102
00:08:09.399 --> 00:08:13.079
people will have faith, but they
will have a back. You don'
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00:08:13.120 --> 00:08:20.680
t know I say I' m
true some light saints that you can bring
104
00:08:20.759 --> 00:08:26.759
us in and out of the Church
several times, do procession races fucking Santadeo
105
00:08:26.759 --> 00:08:28.839
against San Nicanor with overtakings. You
know you see there' s excitement,
106
00:08:30.040 --> 00:08:33.879
they' re looking for the show. Not Easter football teams. For example,
107
00:08:33.919 --> 00:08:43.720
Real Madrid would be the official team
for Easter. They play Ramos Cristiano
108
00:08:45.559 --> 00:08:50.720
Dimoria Casillas, who is a martyr
and Florentino Pérez, who is a superior
109
00:08:50.559 --> 00:08:56.600
and good and pepe being that is
determinative. No, I wouldn' t
110
00:08:56.759 --> 00:08:58.759
miss anyone there, it wouldn'
t be okay. No, but there
111
00:08:58.840 --> 00:09:03.080
are those who look like changes in
the Church. The Church has to adapt
112
00:09:03.120 --> 00:09:07.200
to society. This new pope seems
to be changing it. Everything is very
113
00:09:07.240 --> 00:09:09.559
revolutionary. Well, maybe he'
s branding a rooster and then it'
114
00:09:09.559 --> 00:09:13.759
s all lies. But, well, looks like the guy' s got
115
00:09:13.759 --> 00:09:20.440
good intentions. Thank you. Not
really. You know the old Pope abandoned
116
00:09:20.480 --> 00:09:26.679
us, the German pastor left us. I said something about not being true.
117
00:09:28.120 --> 00:09:31.960
Now we have an Argentine Pope,
the first Argentine to claim to be
118
00:09:33.039 --> 00:09:37.000
only the Pope. No, no, no, no, no, no,
119
00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:37.000
no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
120
00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:37.000
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
121
00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:37.000
no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
122
00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:39.000
no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This
123
00:09:39.120 --> 00:09:43.799
has never been seen before. I
really would have preferred the black pope.
124
00:09:43.840 --> 00:09:46.440
I was very of the black pope. I would have liked a black pope,
125
00:09:46.279 --> 00:09:56.600
Dominican, Puerto Rican, Cuban,
a daddy not seriously, someone who
126
00:09:56.480 --> 00:10:01.320
goes out and tells people like Jesucrista, told the people of Judea, the
127
00:10:01.320 --> 00:10:09.440
people of Judea, dog, dog
and background I like gasoline or Jesus Christ
128
00:10:09.559 --> 00:10:18.799
move hips, if you are the
king of Christians with panties. Well,
129
00:10:18.000 --> 00:10:20.879
this fantasy. I' ve already
gotten carried away. Excuse me, uh,
130
00:10:24.120 --> 00:10:28.399
excuse me In any case, a
good- looking dad. That'
131
00:10:28.480 --> 00:10:31.120
s good. Not those preachers who
go to the subway. I don'
132
00:10:31.240 --> 00:10:35.000
t know if you' ve seen
them first thing in the morning and they
133
00:10:35.120 --> 00:10:37.879
start the messiah will come down from
the sky to sow the apocalypse. You
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' ll die, preachers, one
day I approached one and you tell him
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shut up that it' s me
how to end up with a madman being
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crazier than him. You know that
works. No, but I didn'
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00:10:54.919 --> 00:10:58.480
t come here to talk to you
about the difference between good and evil,
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because I am all adults and you
know that the difference between good and evil
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is wider with a good lawyer involved, that is to say tell Kams.
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He can explain it perfectly. Not
in that sense. No, but come
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00:11:13.840 --> 00:11:16.639
on. I didn' t come
here to make that kind of explanation.
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I am not the son of God, I am not the son of Satan.
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00:11:18.159 --> 00:11:28.000
I' m the crisis, I' m Cris and Chris for friends
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00:11:28.039 --> 00:11:30.679
you thought you were going to sell
flats all your life and sons of Puta.
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00:11:31.200 --> 00:11:37.039
You didn' t take into account
the power of Chris and I had
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00:11:37.120 --> 00:11:41.840
to get everyone scared with how good
I was at home. But, well,
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00:11:41.919 --> 00:11:43.559
you have to pay the mortgage,
you have to make a living.
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It' s very wrong, uh, my mother, there' s the
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00:11:48.080 --> 00:11:52.159
depleted uranium, almost uranium mania,
yeah, really, uh that' s
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like a name of village uranium seriously. Before, they used to tell you
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a little nuclear power. It was
going well as if I were talking to
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you, I was taking you out
of the coffee. You know, but
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00:12:09.279 --> 00:12:13.360
now, after Fukushima, no one
believes in nuclear power. Imagine that the
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00:12:13.440 --> 00:12:20.919
next Gotzila movie is going to come
out rebuilding Japan as to where it was
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freaking out. No. It'
s a bad thing. Markets don'
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t believe in us. The other
day I went down to my fruit maker
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and told him why you didn'
t do it. This true and good
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00:12:28.320 --> 00:12:33.320
did not answer me, but I
took a couple of beautiful onions that doesn
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00:12:33.360 --> 00:12:35.600
' t take it away from you. Nobody. It' s a bad
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00:12:35.600 --> 00:12:39.840
thing. It' s a very
bad thing, but don' t worry
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because in Europe, in Europe,
they' re going to rescue us.
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Europe used to bring big intellectuals like
discards and now brings others like cuts.
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Eh, yes Europe, the old
continent now known as Karrefur. They have
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decided, thank you, that the
solution to our problems is cuts. I
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have to cut my pussy, change
their handcraft, passionately paint and coloring a
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00:13:09.639 --> 00:13:18.720
more cheerful thing. And we have
to cut back on education that' s
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00:13:18.759 --> 00:13:22.320
gotten out of hand. And this
is the country overeducated. No, seriously,
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it' s an excess, this
is a gaffapasta logy. You know,
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00:13:28.279 --> 00:13:31.639
no, no, really. You
don' t know. You don
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' t know how serious that is. And you put tea of five And
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it' s all about scholarship and
knowledge. Had the ninis fight like hear
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it' s called the bantista,
who' s a spiritist. Hey,
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no, fuck me. We cannot
afford all this from now on in schools.
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We' re not going to teach
kids how to write with commas points
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accents parenthesis, because that' s
a printing money you' re throwing at
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00:14:00.000 --> 00:14:01.919
the end of the year. It' s a money you throw away because
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then they end up in whatsappc come
see, come eh ben and conjugating in
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00:14:07.679 --> 00:14:11.600
moticonos that that' s the dicks, eh what a man and that people
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00:14:11.600 --> 00:14:15.639
before were of numbers or letters,
but these generations of signs, that'
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00:14:15.639 --> 00:14:20.399
s very rare. Not then,
if our children have to grow up to
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be idiots, our children grow up
to be idiots. But the square budget,
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that' s the important thing,
to square the budget, uh that
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' s and by the way,
another whim that you' ve taken the
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working class to live, that can' t be this health thing, that
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00:14:46.559 --> 00:14:48.039
you' re all in a health
that gives you cover. From now on
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are we going to make cuts in
sanitation on October 12th? It will only
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open on the 12th of October.
Yeah, I' m sorry. If
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you go to someone else' s
hospital, then you cure a frog'
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s ass. If it doesn'
t heal today, we' ll see,
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we' ll see. Eh and
of course, if you have to
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00:15:11.320 --> 00:15:13.759
die, you die. And if
you have to die, you die.
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But the square budget, that'
s what' s important. Cuadrate the
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budget. And you have to balance
the budget, because you have to compete
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00:15:24.879 --> 00:15:31.759
and you have to produce. Prauthir
and competition compete and produce. It sounds
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00:15:31.879 --> 00:15:41.960
like a fucking song from here in
Africa, sung by Hitler EP Competition and
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00:15:41.120 --> 00:15:46.919
you produce And you have to compete
with chilos. How the fuck do you
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00:15:48.039 --> 00:15:52.159
compete with a Chinese man a machine
programmed to smoke, spit and work?
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00:15:52.639 --> 00:15:56.440
How do you compete with a chaino
if a cheo retires walking into the light.
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00:15:56.919 --> 00:16:11.120
How you compete with a non-
che, how we' re going
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00:16:11.200 --> 00:16:17.799
to compete with the Chinese, with
the child unemployment in this country, children
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who don' t work, and
the Chinese over the years are already sewing
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00:16:22.240 --> 00:16:26.679
balls. For us. We can' t afford children either if children have
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00:16:26.799 --> 00:16:33.600
to work. The children work,
but the square budget very well. How
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00:16:33.679 --> 00:16:42.360
quickly you understood, uh, because
this is trying to explain crack and nobody
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00:16:42.480 --> 00:16:52.080
understands it. I' ve got
half a frightful legislature left over. I
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00:16:52.759 --> 00:16:56.960
can' t allow the children,
but neither can the elderly and the retired.
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I don' t know if there
are people here who are going to
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00:17:00.039 --> 00:17:03.559
retire from this game or pretend to. I' m so sorry. Our
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00:17:03.600 --> 00:17:10.680
elders are a luxury we cannot afford. I' m sorry, I'
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00:17:10.720 --> 00:17:11.079
m sorry, we' re gonna
have to talk to these people. It
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' s just that I have a
lot of experience showing work. Hey what
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00:17:15.119 --> 00:17:18.039
' s that about charging and not
working like that, you can' t
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compete. Spanish retired, please leave
the world in an orderly fashion. I
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00:17:25.079 --> 00:17:30.599
' m sorry, I' m
sorry, we' re gonna get the
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00:17:30.680 --> 00:17:33.519
windows off the Segovia bridge and get
them going. Hey, hey, hey,
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00:17:33.759 --> 00:17:33.759
hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
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00:17:33.759 --> 00:17:36.240
hey, hey, hey. Nice, don' t let them see suffering,
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eh that they do. Like the
synchronized notation to the crazy little mermaid,
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00:17:41.799 --> 00:17:44.799
hey, yeah, yeah, and
if there' s one alive,
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00:17:45.000 --> 00:17:47.960
let' s ask for it with
the petanque. You know, but budget
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00:17:48.160 --> 00:18:02.519
moves great friends. Anyway. Another
of the great novelties of the neoliberal era
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00:18:03.200 --> 00:18:07.880
is the liberal labor forgiveness reform I
am always wrong. A liberal labor pardon
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00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:18.480
reform must be made in order to
make the labour market more flexible The labour
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00:18:18.599 --> 00:18:25.039
market must be made more flexible to
a point where unfair dismissal of a worker
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00:18:25.279 --> 00:18:30.480
will be considered a tribute to the
worker, and so the worker will compensate
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00:18:30.680 --> 00:18:37.359
his boss for the other whim you
have taken, so that an employee can
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00:18:37.400 --> 00:18:42.640
be dismissed and hired several times a
day according to productivity and economic results,
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00:18:44.240 --> 00:18:49.599
creating new methods of revolutionary layoffs,
such as comparative dismissal. You get to
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00:18:49.680 --> 00:18:53.599
work, you get fired, and
at the exit you get hired in half
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00:18:53.680 --> 00:18:57.880
and you go home that doesn'
t know very well what happened. It
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00:18:59.000 --> 00:19:03.440
' s a feeling, a mez
co lance not that you liked, uh,
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00:19:06.240 --> 00:19:11.240
you got a fired face that you
shit ca. You know that young
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00:19:11.359 --> 00:19:18.759
people are firing meat. EH.
In any case, enough with the regrets,
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00:19:18.119 --> 00:19:23.799
enough with the complaints. I have
the solution I could only have it.
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I' m clear. We have
to make a Spanish revolution. But
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00:19:30.279 --> 00:19:37.119
the revolution will be sexual, or
it will be hispanish sexual revolution. Yes,
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gentlemen, we cannot compete with the
Chinese because they are professional slaves.
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00:19:42.079 --> 00:19:45.920
We can' t compete with the
Germans because they' re real sons of
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00:19:45.920 --> 00:19:55.480
the Great Whore. Then we have
to compete with Dominicans, who are poorer,
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00:19:55.839 --> 00:20:00.400
but fuck more. Until when we' re gonna let my citizens go
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00:20:00.480 --> 00:20:07.480
to bed every night without fucking.
The movement is shown by fucking, friends,
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because a well- fucked Spaniard goes
better everywhere in his fucking life.
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00:20:18.160 --> 00:20:22.519
That' s why I' m
going to found the first political party worried
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00:20:22.559 --> 00:20:29.559
that you' re left- wing
or right- wing, you' re
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00:20:29.559 --> 00:20:42.920
working or you' re getting fucked
well. Partido Popular bla Partido Popular nor
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00:20:44.119 --> 00:20:48.519
a Spaniard without fucking a commitment of
everyone. I don' t want women,
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00:20:48.960 --> 00:20:52.039
I don' t want husbands,
I don' t want lovers,
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00:20:52.039 --> 00:20:57.680
I want militants. People who fail
for Spain, fuckers, natos who sleep
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with people more and more unpleasant than
them. These people will receive money from
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00:21:04.079 --> 00:21:10.319
the state for personal damage and will
be considered the hero of the homeland.
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What a fucking Popular Party, not
a Spaniard without fucking everyone' s engagement.
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In the People' s Party we
are going to call general elections.
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Yes, sir We' re here. We are fully in favour of global
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00:21:30.559 --> 00:21:37.319
warming. A Partido Popular, not
a Spaniard without fucking a commitment of everything.
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00:21:37.680 --> 00:21:42.000
I' m worried about young people
seriously, these people who won'
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00:21:42.039 --> 00:21:47.160
t be able to access decent housing
and they' re going to have to
257
00:21:47.279 --> 00:21:52.200
make love in a shithole or in
a room next to their parents for you
258
00:21:52.839 --> 00:22:02.400
I' m going to build follódromos. Yes, Mr Big, what buildings
259
00:22:02.519 --> 00:22:07.519
where you can fuck in the company
of all your fucking Facebook. Yes,
260
00:22:07.599 --> 00:22:11.960
friends, Popular Party, not a
Spaniard without fucking a commitment of all,
261
00:22:11.079 --> 00:22:15.480
because to fuck us between four,
let' s fuck each other man.
262
00:22:18.920 --> 00:22:27.559
Yes, Mr Popular Party, not
a Spaniard without fucking everyone' s engagement.
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00:22:27.759 --> 00:22:33.599
You will be my excitation minister,
yes, and you will be my
264
00:22:33.759 --> 00:22:41.559
minister of making it Popular Party or
a Spaniard without fucking a commitment from everyone.
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00:22:41.200 --> 00:22:45.319
I' m gonna fuck you all. You want to fuck me.
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That' s how I like it. Friends, there are some who believe
267
00:22:52.640 --> 00:22:56.400
that the solution to this crisis is
to give everyone a pick and a shovel
268
00:22:56.519 --> 00:23:02.759
and come and bite. I say
pussy and what miners protest. And besides,
269
00:23:02.799 --> 00:23:04.279
if we all get itchy, we' re gonna get the world to
270
00:23:04.359 --> 00:23:10.400
dismy in the middle of the universe
like an effervescent aspirin. It' s
271
00:23:10.400 --> 00:23:12.200
nothing more. And others say the
solution is to put a guillotine in the
272
00:23:12.279 --> 00:23:18.920
village squares and cut the politicians and
bankers' heads off. I can'
273
00:23:18.960 --> 00:23:22.559
t be in favor of something as
wild as the beak and the stop.
274
00:23:27.480 --> 00:23:32.039
But, my friends, don'
t lose faith. Things are fucked up
275
00:23:32.079 --> 00:23:34.680
but don' t lose faith.
The human being is wonderful. What happens
276
00:23:34.799 --> 00:23:40.000
is that you don' t notice, you notice and you' re here
277
00:23:40.079 --> 00:23:42.240
conservative, you' ve been offended. I have to tell you that I
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00:23:42.319 --> 00:23:47.799
have things of conservative mentality that I
deeply respect. I also like to fuck
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00:23:48.039 --> 00:23:48.680
without a condom many times








