Turisticidio

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The tremendous borderline of the tremendous Court, at a public hearing, the tremendous

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judge of the tremendous Court is going
to solve a tremendous case of eight to

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three years. Good evening, sir, and before we move on, there

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' s a complaint signed by Dr
Luis López Venero, a dentist, accusing

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an artist who took a bite out
of him and wouldn' t pay for

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it. I know a mess here
I' m aware of that. No,

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we don' t do anything,
give her a hundred pesos of fines

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because that artist, he didn'
t pull any tooth. No, well,

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sure, well, and how you
guys do health, well, regular

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I feel very weak and very spoiled
and that you are taking nothing for that,

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because you do very bad. Look, I' m going to put

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it on a plan that' s
going to give it a wonderful result.

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You will see yes in the morning, when you wake up if you fear

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twenty and drops of old age yes
at noon, at lunch, three tablets

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of old phenol, you do not
yes. And at night, before bedtime,

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four pictoresitas of boccan bull and it' s good, all magnificent.

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You will see that within three days
of taking all that you feel as strong

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and as healthy as when you were
fifty. I' m starting to make

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fifty pesos of a fine right now. Well, that' s right,

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stop giving me a prescription and tell
me what case we have. The case

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is what you have to do.
It' s okay, Mr Joe.

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What we have today is a guy
who' s been accused of cheating on

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tourists. Then call the complicated in
that tourist and quote immediately Mr Joe Luz,

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Maria Na Nanina here every day,
Rudecinga, Caldeiro and Escoviña, José

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Candelario, three Papines, Ala,
let' s see who the accused is

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without shame that of three skates,
sir who has come here to the tourists

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to deceive him and take the money. That' s not true. To

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the baby, I do nothing but
teach the rites. The nice thing we

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have in Cuba. That' s
not pretty stuff, really. Yes,

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Mr Poque Ne, you know he' s the retractor. Where the renanguero

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is. A tranquero, viva Chico, retractor, the part outside of Cobacha,

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alien of tranque ah yes, yes, yes, foreigner abroad will see

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very nice thing to see. But
inside Cuba we also have very nice things,

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such as, for example, man
boys, the street of vinelesch as

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street of villages, the street of
Vineyard Le that is there is street vineyard

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that you will see down the valley
of Viñales Chico. Indeed, very well

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answered. Well, although, of
course, in Cuba there are not only

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beautiful things, not delicacy and although
it does not hurt to say it,

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we have to have if we see
and confess that in Cuba we also have

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very ugly things, such as,
for example, rudeness from your god,

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Doctor, put a fine on him
for that disrespect, saying there is no

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lack of respect. The fact that
the three parties put it, as an

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example, should be of pride to
you, because that shows that you are

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a citizen. Oh, come on. I' m an exemplary citizen.

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Yes, sir, and that is
why you set a clear example to me

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: yes, thank you very much. Then three skates, but the next

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time you talk about the ugly things
in Cuba, put me, for example,

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to the Judge. Not reciting from
sonata what we' re left with,

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man. You say that' s
a pride. I hope I'

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m not proud. I' m
very democrat. Ah well, so am

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I and with you that Nanamina is
right and that what three skates do is

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swindle the São Paulo. I repeat
done nine of Roshinto, which is not

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true. Listen, sir, you
know what three skates did. The other

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day he made sir charged fifty pesos
to a tourist because to carry him in

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machines from Havana to Santiago is not
a girl, but that was the tisimo

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let that it gave you clearly that
yes, because from the band to Santiago

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de Cuba and nine hundred seventy kilometers, so not. No. No.

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No. No. If the thing
wasn' t Santiago de Cuba, no,

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where it was then Santiago de las
Vegas. You charged that tourist fifty

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pesos for taking him to Santiago de
las Vegas. Three fatines, well,

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he laughed. It' s not
that I stocito if I have Chico look,

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I charged him the fifty- sixty, nothing more than fifty sitting.

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Yeah, because he asked me how
motch how the how boy Moe told me,

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howmorge aha. You say it no, no, but it is so,

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Howmage, then I told him fisti
ift i mean that fifty was aha,

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then it seems astounded by how cheap
I charged him. Fipsti told me.

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I told him and Fiti aha.
Then I you, why I'

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m going to wait, I'
m going to talk what you' re

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going to see. Well, you' re kids. Tell you, gentlemen,

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you didn' t give a fifty- dollar bill to yourself. Ah

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yes, aha and why you stayed
with them. Well, because I thought

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in the other forty- nine fifty
he tipped me. Well, thirty oil.

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You oiled who oiled the too close. I accepted it. You'

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ve done the same thing, too, no, sir That' s what

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being says, well, three skates, but you just told him Fifty,

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right. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no more fi.

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And why didn' t you clarify
it was pennies and not dollars?

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Guys, man, I couldn'
t guys. Why I couldn' t

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because I couldn' t, I
can' t say fift and schen in

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American and how I say it now, three parties, what you, what

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things they fifty cents and what you
mean you fisist hundred fifty cents. Sure,

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sure. Or nine. Now that
I' m here to find out

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Media Shap Secretary, give him fifty
pesos of fine, because of everything,

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finally three skateboards. The point was
that you put in fifty dollars for a

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little trip to Santiago de la Vega. It' s not that, no,

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no, no, there was no, no twenty- five, nothing

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more, for the other twenty-
five were for the house. Why the

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lalo cousin mine which owns cousins no, not mine has heard my man,

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whose son is the hello boy,
I have read it from Lola, Lola

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sister whose Lili is Lily' s. Yeah, Lily' s the older

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brother of cinema and Lulu' s, uh, and cinematium than what if

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fool' s been pre for you
I' ll fix it for you.

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Then I don' t know how
silence comes in. That' s where

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he doesn' t know how sinecio
comes in, because because of that movie

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band in the dramata, then it
turns out. I know Lalo owns the

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machine or the guide business. Tourists
have him halfway between my cousin Lalo and

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eight. So and where they take
the tourists they take him to the cathedral,

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yes of course. It' s
a boy' s weapon mass Adone

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to the Weapon Square. She also
calls it in the square. No,

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sir, I say to the square
that is in front of the Ajuntamién,

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so do we, boys, and
the data. There' s all the

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trade that' s going on The
ex acts all the menuments there are.

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He' s taught the world or
not. Not everything. Yeah, yeah,

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the tattoo, no, tattoo not
monument to everything. That' s

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the chin lesson That' s how
he shows it all. No. Well,

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this is something else. Doctor No, on behalf of the Tourist Guides

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Union, to which I have the
honour of belonging, I ask that three

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skates should not be allowed to continue
exercising this profession because it says one of

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nonsense that truly constitutes an attack on
culture and an obvious danger to the good

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organization that must exist in seo or
activity. So, of course, Doctor,

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you think the other day I took
some tourists there to the cathedral square

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and told them this is the Cathedral
of Havana. The time of Spain then

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led him to the gathering and told
them to see to the gathering of Havana

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also the time of Spain? That' s not true, but did he

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then take it to the light pier, teach them the Bay and tell them

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the Havana Bay of Spain' s
weather? Also or that' s true.

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Enclosure the Bay wasn' t there. It has in bre Spain and

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your God, the Bay is there
long before the Spanish compadres arrived. You

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won' t see. He'
s going to tell me now that they

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gave the lotions how the figs of
them were going to do it three games.

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Of course not the Spaniards, who
still have the slabs and wood in

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Fonwich. The men, the bays
were made by nature. Hey, listen

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to the other one. That'
s the one thing about the other,

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but of course it is, nature
comes here with nature, it did the

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boat, no, sir, the
ships were made by the men from long

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after and then why nature made the
bay. Yeah, yeah, if I

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didn' t have banc shawls skates. That' s one thing that'

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s shutting it off. Bathing.
The truth is that I believe that you

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are in no way able to continue
to guide the people. Of course not,

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sir, that you think a man
like that is capable of taking a

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tourist trip. Suppose the valley of
Viñales. No. No, no,

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no, wait a minute, ma' am, a minute careful with that

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Viñales Valley. Listen to me in
the valley of Viñales. My cousin and

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I have taken it. Yeah.
You don' t know how much excursion

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that cha was and I even took
a little verse out into the valley and

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I told it all to myself.
I' m sure that little brat took

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it from his cousin. Cuckoo cuckoo
then like he says good, because I

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registered him for me to resurrect him. What he enrolled for me to resurrect.

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He died. You didn' t
tell Mary what Mary looks like,

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but you registered her. He'
s that for me to rewrite. Where

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the record of the girl fucked up
a pencil there on a carama wrote,

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he wrote of belief. He wrote
it for you to recite. They recited

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it. See how he says look
at him like he says vineyards, I

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can never forget you as long as
I live. To see you you have

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to climb a hill uphill. Do
me a favor. You' ve ever

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seen a hill that' s not
uphill, have you? Madam that same

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hill, after you have arrived the
copito up there, because it becomes downhill,

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yes? And to maraderos you have
also gone as true as not boy

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to true I take out another verse
that says so. See the beach in

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Baradero has a sand so thin that
instead of calling it sand, they should

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call it Harina. They have your
God, but how they' re going

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to call Harina compadre so they can
start picking up the chamfers to make tamales.

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And what heroes being of the tamales
the other is evident and what other

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things he has done to you verses. Ah the bayer kills, tells him

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another that says so. The bay
of slaughter is a beautiful one. The

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only bad thing is the water that
has a lot of moisture, so that

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the water in the slaughter bay has
a lot of moisture and has a little

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Meda already to the cave of le
beyamar I also made another versito. As

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he says so, notice, the
caves must call have a great beauty and

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they have droplets of water that shut
you in the head. Don' t

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tell me, and those booties of
anus were the ones that called your attention

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in such a propitious place, to
contemplation and romanticism, to ketch to romanticism.

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You don' t like romanticism.
I don' t know, I

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' ve never eaten it. It' s root and that' s not

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it, sir. Who does not, Lord, you have some more charge

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to make to three skates How not, sir, for the gravest of all

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the accusations is missing. Yeah,
which, then, this three- legged

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bandit has been a pile of tourists. You' ve scammed him selling him

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a ballot for a chibi chala he' s got telling him they' re

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tickets for the national tria draw.
No. Not a moment. I'

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ve sold it in the chivallina,
but it' s chala, yes,

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picha la chichana, yes, but
I never said anything about national. What

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do you mean, not both of
us. Ma' am, I said

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that ticket was for the lottery draw. Nothing' s good for the case.

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Anyway, it' s not rude, it' s not the same,

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because what I tell you is the
truth. And like there' s

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no cheating, there' s no
cheating because there' s no three-

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bit scam. You tell us those
tickets are for the lottery draw. Yeah,

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kiddo,' cause they' re
for a bachelor who makes my cousin

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lalo every month. You know,
uh- huh They' re for a

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draw that his cousin lalos makes.
Yeah, and you know, how I

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asked my cousin to give it up
like he did. That' s why

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I tell you they' re for
the lottery draw. Moment three your cousins

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are surnamed theory, word that xi
che and that last name exists, well,

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guys, yes, here among us
exists no. He asked me not

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to exist, because the truth is
that my cousin was called la lo Fernández.

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Come on, his name was Fernández. Yeah, but that changed his

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last name. And why did you
change your last name, man, what

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a small question to be able to
put on it turritos ticket. That'

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s not how he commits deli.
Write there, Secretary, come sit down

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for the lottery, doing my duty, I have you to put fourteen months

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and one day and if I see
you getting close to foreign tourists, you

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can prepare now because I will put
you ten years. Ay puede Fernández,

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Aníbal de Barro Mexical, Adolfo Pedro
and MiguelÁngel Herrera writes Castor Bispo,

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Production and Direction. Miguel yao Lobo
Iglesias, who speaks to them, tells

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them very good luck. Friends Audio
Centra