Ser el arquitecto de tu realidad

WEBVTT

1
00:00:08.279 --> 00:00:13.880
Hello everyone and welcome to ideas for
a better life. I am Eugenio pallar

2
00:00:13.880 --> 00:00:18.600
Ruiz, reader, hard- working
and lover of personal development. Today I

3
00:00:18.640 --> 00:00:24.879
want to talk to you about how
we can become the architects of our own

4
00:00:24.879 --> 00:00:30.160
reality. And before you start,
as always, remind yourself that you have

5
00:00:30.199 --> 00:00:36.880
at your disposal a compilation of the
most relevant ideas and tips on personal development.

6
00:00:37.399 --> 00:00:41.880
In my four books you already know
them free, healthy and happy,

7
00:00:42.159 --> 00:00:46.840
thirty- one days to improve your
life, minimalism for normal people and seven

8
00:00:46.880 --> 00:00:52.640
steps for a purposeful life. I
leave you their link link to all of

9
00:00:53.159 --> 00:00:59.280
them in the notes of the episode
and also since in many of you have

10
00:00:59.359 --> 00:01:03.560
asked me how and where to form
a personal development. I tell you what

11
00:01:03.640 --> 00:01:07.400
has worked for me, which is
the personal development master' s degree online,

12
00:01:07.680 --> 00:01:11.439
from IPP' s Institute of Positive
Thinking. You know what. I

13
00:01:11.599 --> 00:01:17.560
think it is the best training that
exists in this field, because Kom covers

14
00:01:17.640 --> 00:01:23.040
in depth the six main areas of
life, self- knowledge, body and

15
00:01:23.560 --> 00:01:30.359
health, emotions, relationships, transcendence
and money and career. If you want

16
00:01:30.400 --> 00:01:36.000
to take a look at your free
master clash, I leave the link also

17
00:01:36.239 --> 00:01:40.719
below in the description of the episode, in the notes, a little lower

18
00:01:40.799 --> 00:01:46.239
than the play button next to my
books. And now we are going to

19
00:01:46.560 --> 00:01:55.000
talk about how we can become the
architect of our own reality. We all

20
00:01:55.079 --> 00:02:00.159
have glasses that we wear to see
reality. Each of our brains has its

21
00:02:00.319 --> 00:02:08.240
own way of decoding everything it perceives
through the senses. It is in our

22
00:02:08.319 --> 00:02:16.879
neural networks within the brain, where
we store beliefs, memories, experiences and

23
00:02:16.960 --> 00:02:23.719
when we submit to a stimulus,
these networks are activated and that activation causes

24
00:02:23.840 --> 00:02:29.879
emotions to be generated in us.
And those emotions, in turn, give

25
00:02:29.960 --> 00:02:35.759
rise to thoughts. And those thoughts, in turn, give rise to words

26
00:02:36.039 --> 00:02:39.560
we say or actions we take,
that is, things we do or don

27
00:02:39.719 --> 00:02:45.199
' t do. And those words
we say or things we do or don

28
00:02:45.199 --> 00:02:52.159
' t do, lead us to
achieve some results or others and all that

29
00:02:52.159 --> 00:02:58.120
together, all that process, from
perception to what we do. All that

30
00:02:58.680 --> 00:03:06.400
builds our reality and, of course, these neural networks are different for each

31
00:03:06.520 --> 00:03:10.960
of us. That' s why
every person sees life in a different way.

32
00:03:12.719 --> 00:03:17.159
That is why we perceive the same
objective reality in a different way.

33
00:03:17.840 --> 00:03:22.800
If I see a tree, I
perceive it in a different way than how

34
00:03:22.840 --> 00:03:30.560
you perceive it, because what we
perceive as reality does not necessarily correspond to

35
00:03:30.599 --> 00:03:37.759
what it really is, but rather
to who we are. So the key

36
00:03:38.199 --> 00:03:46.360
to transforming your reality is to transform
that filter, to change the neural networks

37
00:03:46.879 --> 00:03:52.039
that we use by default, to
decode the reality that we perceive by the

38
00:03:52.039 --> 00:03:59.120
senses. When we' re kids, we' re real, but as

39
00:03:59.120 --> 00:04:03.560
we grow up. Our parents,
our teachers, are transmitting their own beliefs

40
00:04:03.639 --> 00:04:11.439
to us. And those beliefs are
often based on fears that they themselves have,

41
00:04:11.840 --> 00:04:16.360
sometimes with reason and sometimes with no
reason. And this on a large

42
00:04:16.839 --> 00:04:23.800
scale in all the people we inhabit
on the planet is what we normally call

43
00:04:23.839 --> 00:04:30.399
the system, which is really nothing
but a generalized perception, which is of

44
00:04:30.480 --> 00:04:38.279
a mental nature. So sometimes you
have to get rid of that system.

45
00:04:38.879 --> 00:04:43.279
If what we want is to transform
our reality. And to get rid of

46
00:04:43.360 --> 00:04:48.240
that system you have the first thing
you have to transform are some of your

47
00:04:48.240 --> 00:04:53.959
beliefs. In reality, beliefs are
neither good nor bad, neither true nor

48
00:04:54.040 --> 00:05:01.279
false. The important thing about beliefs
is whether they are limited before or empowering.

49
00:05:02.000 --> 00:05:08.600
So think about whether what you think
is benefiting you or hurting you,

50
00:05:09.600 --> 00:05:15.160
whether it' s driving the best
out of you or not. From time

51
00:05:15.199 --> 00:05:19.279
to time, it is good to
do a review of our beliefs. It

52
00:05:19.360 --> 00:05:26.879
is good to identify those that no
longer serve you and to consciously choose those

53
00:05:27.160 --> 00:05:30.839
that you want to adopt because they
do serve you. Think that changing a

54
00:05:30.959 --> 00:05:40.800
belief can completely transform your life,
it can also transform even your personal identity,

55
00:05:41.600 --> 00:05:45.759
because, behind any kind of obstacle, behind any kind of fear of

56
00:05:46.160 --> 00:05:54.720
conflict, always, there is always
an underlying belief. Remember also what we

57
00:05:54.759 --> 00:05:59.600
talked about in the episode about the
PNL, about neurolinguistic programming. The map

58
00:05:59.639 --> 00:06:05.480
is not the territory. Each person
elaborates a mental map that allows him to

59
00:06:05.920 --> 00:06:11.920
orient himself in that vast territory that
is life all human beings. No exception.

60
00:06:12.160 --> 00:06:18.240
We do this and build a map
means that we generalize, that we

61
00:06:18.319 --> 00:06:25.759
omit and that we distort certain aspects
of reality. And this means that there

62
00:06:25.800 --> 00:06:33.279
is no single reality. It means
that there are multiple realities that vary according

63
00:06:33.319 --> 00:06:42.680
to individual perspectives, but all these
individual perspectives remain maps. And a map,

64
00:06:43.040 --> 00:06:50.000
by its own definition, cannot encompass
all the complexity of reality. So,

65
00:06:50.079 --> 00:06:55.000
in addition to reviewing our beliefs,
as I told you before, understanding

66
00:06:55.040 --> 00:07:00.639
that our interpretation of reality is just
a map, we have to do something

67
00:07:00.720 --> 00:07:05.519
else, which is to modify our
thinking patterns that in the penis are called

68
00:07:06.000 --> 00:07:14.720
metaprograms. Stop operating in automatic mode, try different approaches, try to do

69
00:07:14.759 --> 00:07:20.759
things differently. If what you want
are different results, if you keep repeating

70
00:07:20.759 --> 00:07:27.639
the same actions, you will get
the same results. And we know that,

71
00:07:27.680 --> 00:07:30.519
and yet we tend to hold on
to the known, to what we

72
00:07:30.639 --> 00:07:36.720
' ve already experienced, and what
usually happens is that we get exactly the

73
00:07:36.759 --> 00:07:45.879
exact same result over and over again
part of that process that you can play

74
00:07:46.000 --> 00:07:54.279
if you want to get different results
is how you communicate you have to know

75
00:07:55.160 --> 00:07:59.399
that it' s impossible not to
communicate constantly. We are transmitting information to

76
00:07:59.480 --> 00:08:05.720
others, even if we do not
want to, because human beings communicate on

77
00:08:05.480 --> 00:08:11.680
a conscious and unconscious level. We
communicate verbally and non- verbally. Then

78
00:08:11.720 --> 00:08:18.800
the key is to adapt your way
of communicating to the environment you are in.

79
00:08:18.920 --> 00:08:26.079
Become an outside observer when you touch
and implicate yourself emotionally when you need

80
00:08:26.079 --> 00:08:30.639
to. Neither of these two ways
of communicating, which are a little bit

81
00:08:30.759 --> 00:08:35.799
the two extremes, neither is better
than the other, But the good thing,

82
00:08:35.919 --> 00:08:41.000
what I propose is that you be
able to use them at your whim

83
00:08:41.039 --> 00:08:46.919
that you do not automatically jump one
way of communicating or another, but that

84
00:08:48.039 --> 00:08:52.399
you be free to use them when
it suits you, just as we talked

85
00:08:52.440 --> 00:08:58.360
about personality traits in the episode.
Another point to consider. If you want

86
00:08:58.440 --> 00:09:03.799
to improve your results, it is
to understand that the body, the mind

87
00:09:03.840 --> 00:09:09.720
and the emotions are connected, even
if we sometimes overlook this reality, so

88
00:09:09.720 --> 00:09:15.919
if you modify one you modify the
others. That' s why I always

89
00:09:16.039 --> 00:09:20.840
tell you that everything starts in the
body, neglects it with a bad diet,

90
00:09:20.919 --> 00:09:26.799
neglects it with lack of exercise,
all that disconnects us not only from

91
00:09:26.879 --> 00:09:30.720
our body, disconnects us also from
our mind and our emotions, which,

92
00:09:31.080 --> 00:09:35.639
in the end is as much as
saying that we disconnect from ourselves. And

93
00:09:35.759 --> 00:09:41.240
of course you' ll say,
here we' re talking about getting results,

94
00:09:41.639 --> 00:09:45.480
but what results we' re talking
about. We' re talking about

95
00:09:45.519 --> 00:09:50.639
money, no, we' re
not talking about money, or we'

96
00:09:50.639 --> 00:09:54.159
re not just talking about money.
The result to which I refer is inner

97
00:09:54.200 --> 00:09:58.720
peace, which, by the way, is the only thing that has the

98
00:09:58.080 --> 00:10:05.720
ability to make us feel realized.
When we get that inner peace, we

99
00:10:05.759 --> 00:10:09.000
understand that we don' t really
need that much. We need nothing but

100
00:10:09.240 --> 00:10:16.559
a few basic things. We realize
that binding our happiness to the material is

101
00:10:16.639 --> 00:10:22.679
a trap, because when you do, you always want more. You will

102
00:10:22.799 --> 00:10:28.279
never feel completely satisfied and, above
all, when you live thinking about the

103
00:10:28.360 --> 00:10:33.480
material, you move away from the
present, which in reality you already know

104
00:10:33.559 --> 00:10:39.600
is all that matters, because neither
the past nor the future exist The true

105
00:10:39.639 --> 00:10:46.879
result. True freedom is to have
inner peace, because when you have it,

106
00:10:46.799 --> 00:10:52.559
you no longer depend on the outside
world. You don' t need

107
00:10:52.559 --> 00:10:58.000
anything anymore. You don' t
need anything anymore. And that state of

108
00:10:58.080 --> 00:11:05.360
not needing is maximum freedom. And
there are still many people who think that

109
00:11:05.440 --> 00:11:13.679
freedom is linked to economic, financial
freedom. That state of not needing frees

110
00:11:13.759 --> 00:11:18.480
us from fear frees us from fear
of what we do not have, frees

111
00:11:18.559 --> 00:11:22.360
us from fear of losing what we
have and also frees us from fear of

112
00:11:22.399 --> 00:11:26.879
not being happy without having certain things. But it also frees us from anger

113
00:11:28.720 --> 00:11:33.960
because when we fear nothing, there
is no reason to be angry, or

114
00:11:33.080 --> 00:11:39.240
to criticize another person, or when
someone tries to hurt us, there is

115
00:11:39.360 --> 00:11:46.360
no reason to be offended. No
one can harm anyone who has conquered his

116
00:11:46.440 --> 00:11:50.879
inner peace. That person with inner
peace, if he sees that something is

117
00:11:50.879 --> 00:11:54.919
broken, he rebuilds it, if
he sees that something goes wrong, nothing

118
00:11:54.960 --> 00:12:00.200
happens, because he understands that everything
is for something, that everything has a

119
00:12:00.240 --> 00:12:05.360
motive or even if we cannot understand
it, but eye, having inner peace

120
00:12:05.440 --> 00:12:09.120
does not imply rejecting the material.
It' s not one thing or the

121
00:12:09.120 --> 00:12:15.879
other. They are not incompatible in
fact, people who have inner peace will

122
00:12:15.919 --> 00:12:20.080
enjoy the material more than anyone else, because neither the material possesses them nor

123
00:12:20.879 --> 00:12:26.080
they have the feeling of possessing the
material, because these people with inner peace

124
00:12:26.159 --> 00:12:31.440
understand that, deep down, we
do not own anything. And that'

125
00:12:31.480 --> 00:12:37.600
s freedom, too. Their connection
to material things is voluntary, not of

126
00:12:37.720 --> 00:12:45.360
necessity. They don' t need
things voluntarily. They get those things because

127
00:12:45.360 --> 00:12:48.519
they bring something, but they don' t need them. They don'

128
00:12:48.799 --> 00:12:56.639
t need anything to feel happy or
to feel complete. And that' s

129
00:12:56.639 --> 00:13:00.679
why I don' t think it' s a good idea to work exclusively

130
00:13:00.679 --> 00:13:05.200
for money. What' s a
good idea is to make money by doing

131
00:13:05.559 --> 00:13:09.000
things that make you passionate, doing
things that you' re good at,

132
00:13:09.399 --> 00:13:16.720
doing things that serve others because that' s when you' re closest to

133
00:13:16.039 --> 00:13:20.960
getting that inner peace. Remember that
the order of life follows this course.

134
00:13:20.679 --> 00:13:28.120
First, be, second, do, third have. So, having is

135
00:13:28.679 --> 00:13:35.159
still a natural consequence if we have
followed the previous steps in coherence, if

136
00:13:35.159 --> 00:13:41.080
we have first been and then done
something that is in line with who we

137
00:13:41.200 --> 00:13:48.759
are. So, for putting it
down to the practical aspect, think about

138
00:13:48.799 --> 00:13:52.000
whether you would continue to do the
same thing you do on a day-

139
00:13:52.000 --> 00:13:54.960
to- day basis. If they' ll stop paying you. For example,

140
00:13:54.840 --> 00:13:58.240
your boss comes tomorrow and tells you
you won' t be able to

141
00:13:58.279 --> 00:14:07.840
pay you any more to get your
job done, you' d probably keep

142
00:14:09.000 --> 00:14:11.120
working on it no, so what
would you do, since they won'

143
00:14:11.120 --> 00:14:20.440
t pay you? Think about how
you' d change your life if you

144
00:14:20.440 --> 00:14:22.480
said you wouldn' t keep doing
it. That' s because you'

145
00:14:22.559 --> 00:14:26.080
re not really proud of what you
do on a day- to- day

146
00:14:26.159 --> 00:14:31.159
basis, which is what happens to
a lot of people and that' s

147
00:14:31.600 --> 00:14:35.039
probably getting noticed in every aspect of
your life. People notice when the other

148
00:14:35.159 --> 00:14:39.440
person, the person in front of
us, is proud of himself or not,

149
00:14:39.600 --> 00:14:43.200
even if we don' t say
it openly, because we' re

150
00:14:43.320 --> 00:14:46.320
all very polite and we' re
not going to say it. But think

151
00:14:46.360 --> 00:14:50.720
about life in another way or in
a way that you can be proud of,

152
00:14:52.559 --> 00:14:56.559
not to impress anyone, but to
impress yourself, because when you have

153
00:14:56.600 --> 00:15:03.159
a good concept of yourself, others
perceive it and others treat you the same

154
00:15:03.240 --> 00:15:09.879
way you do. You' re
treating yourself. If they perceive that you

155
00:15:09.960 --> 00:15:13.639
are at ease in your skin and
circumstances, they will treat you better than

156
00:15:13.720 --> 00:15:22.360
if they see that you are screwed, frustrated, etcetera. Return once again

157
00:15:22.440 --> 00:15:24.279
to the same idea that I exposed
to you at the beginning. The world

158
00:15:24.360 --> 00:15:28.840
is not as it is, but
as you are. All this, as

159
00:15:28.879 --> 00:15:33.799
you can see, is closely related. So, if there' s something

160
00:15:33.799 --> 00:15:37.320
you want in life and you haven' t done it yet, you have

161
00:15:37.679 --> 00:15:43.559
to structure your days so that all
your actions, all your thoughts, all

162
00:15:43.600 --> 00:15:50.120
your words are aligned with that goal
and repeat one day and another day and

163
00:15:50.120 --> 00:15:54.320
another day. In the end,
this is habits and more habits and acting

164
00:15:54.320 --> 00:15:58.440
like this, you' re going
to have results, even if things go

165
00:15:58.519 --> 00:16:03.200
wrong, you' re not going
to have a font, maybe you'

166
00:16:03.320 --> 00:16:10.039
re going to have results, just
like for a muscle to grow in the

167
00:16:10.080 --> 00:16:12.559
gym, you have to submit to
more resistance than you can bear, because

168
00:16:12.559 --> 00:16:18.440
the same happens with people. In
order to grow personally, you need to

169
00:16:18.519 --> 00:16:23.799
face challenges you haven' t faced
before. Overcoming those difficulties, those challenges

170
00:16:25.399 --> 00:16:30.480
are what will enable us to grow. The key is not to try to

171
00:16:30.519 --> 00:16:37.559
avoid failures or frustrations. The key
is to become a person more and more

172
00:16:37.639 --> 00:16:44.840
able to face those challenges, those
frustrations. And there are many people who

173
00:16:44.879 --> 00:16:51.080
do the opposite, who try to
avoid those activities or those things in which

174
00:16:51.200 --> 00:16:56.519
they can fail or which can generate
frustration. And what really makes us feel

175
00:16:56.559 --> 00:17:00.360
alive and makes us feel good and
makes us grow is just. Otherwise,

176
00:17:00.679 --> 00:17:07.640
we are facing ever greater challenges so
that we can continue to grow. The

177
00:17:07.720 --> 00:17:14.359
day you stop feeling frustrated, you' ll be dead, you' ll

178
00:17:14.440 --> 00:17:19.279
have stopped growing and if it goes
well, fine. But in reality,

179
00:17:19.680 --> 00:17:25.440
the process is the only thing that
really matters more than the result itself.

180
00:17:29.519 --> 00:17:33.640
So you know, reality is formed
through our beliefs, our emotions, our

181
00:17:33.640 --> 00:17:41.559
thoughts, our words and our actions. It' s a chain. So,

182
00:17:41.839 --> 00:17:45.799
to change our reality, we can
act in different parts of the process,

183
00:17:47.079 --> 00:17:52.680
for example, by going to the
beginning and changing our limiting beliefs to

184
00:17:52.680 --> 00:17:57.279
more empowering ones. We can also
improve the relationship with our body, because

185
00:17:57.359 --> 00:18:02.079
taking care of it. We are
taking care of our mind and our emotions.

186
00:18:02.839 --> 00:18:10.839
When we make changes, positive changes
improve our results. But the result

187
00:18:10.880 --> 00:18:15.440
we must seek is not only the
material result, but inner peace, because,

188
00:18:15.799 --> 00:18:21.680
as we have explained, inner peace
is the only thing that can guarantee

189
00:18:22.599 --> 00:18:29.519
us to be free and live a
better life. If you liked this episode,

190
00:18:30.000 --> 00:18:34.160
please give it to like share social
networks or visit three WWS. Point

191
00:18:34.519 --> 00:18:41.039
ideas to live better. Here you
can subscribe and download for free a copy

192
00:18:41.079 --> 00:18:47.640
of my latest book, Seven steps
for a life with purpose and if you

193
00:18:47.680 --> 00:18:52.559
want to learn much more and train
in personal development with the best experts,

194
00:18:52.200 --> 00:18:56.920
check out the free master class of
the personal development master, online, of

195
00:18:57.240 --> 00:19:02.680
IPP of possible institute of thought.
I' ll leave you his link in

196
00:19:02.720 --> 00:19:07.559
the episode notes. A little bit
lower in the description next to my books

197
00:19:07.599 --> 00:19:11.920
and I just said goodbye. Thank
you very much, as always and until the next