Cuida tu familia

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Bomba, why the affective relationships I
have are not stable. I like assertiveness

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because it invites us to prudence that
what should motivate our word is always love

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is you and that is already the
basis to go out to conquer many goals,

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to fight, to give a better
version and enjoy life fully. You

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know happiness depends on the quality of
our relationships. As long as you have

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healthy ties, you can live in
well- being, you can have that

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attitude that makes you overcome difficulties,
that makes you live happily in the midst

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of the conditions of daily life.
One of the foundational mental bonds of all

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existence is the family. That'
s why today I want to talk to

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you about taking care of the family
and how you take care of the family

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by generating very healthy habits in your
relationships. Now I have to say that

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the family is the one you have, not the perfect family, because that

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doesn' t exist. Sometimes,
because we are talking about the ideal of

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the family, we stop valuing reality, the people around us who are the

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ones who really form what we call
family. I like to define the family,

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not from the roles, not from
the members, but I like to

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understand the family as that intimate circle
of protection, of care, of affection

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with which I count to build my
existence. If you want to take care

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of that context, that inner circle, you must have some family habits.

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I propose five habits. The first
is that of accurate communication. We need

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to know how to talk and we
need to know how to hear that sounds

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so simple, so obvious, it
becomes a problem in everyday life. Many

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of the difficulties of the family occur
because we do not know how to speak,

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because we do not know how to
tell the truth with the right words,

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with the emotions indicated in the places
and in the right times. Many

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of us, when we try to
communicate a truth, generate a situation of

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pain, sadness, anger that does
not make the bond healthy. But we

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also find it hard to listen,
we find it hard to focus on what

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the other person says now. Communicating
is not imposing a truth. Communicating implies

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these actions, generating consensus, understanding
what is best and knowing what interests are

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being brought together. First habit assertive
communication, you take care of your family.

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When you take care of your communication
when you strive to make that communication

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fluid and allow relationships to develop and
achieve the purposes. A second habit is

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to have clear limits, healthy limits. We' re family, but that

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doesn' t mean we can invade
each other. That doesn' t mean

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we can trample on each other'
s dignity. Limits have to be set,

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and limits have to do with four
realities for me. A dignity,

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no word, no action can call
into question the dignity of the other person.

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I take care of my family,
when I take care of my dignity

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and when I take care of the
dignity of the other two, the boundaries

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are connected with intimacy. I cannot
invade the personal spaces, the essential original

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spaces. Everyone has the right to
privacy and to be a family. It

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doesn' t empower me to go
in and out and get me into all

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three. The limits have to do
with the abilities and have to do with

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the abilities of others. I can' t disable them, I can'

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t block them sometimes believing that it' s the best. We express affection

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as overprotection and end up blocking others
and not allowing them to be and not

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allow them to develop. And the
fourth dimension to me with which the boundaries

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are linked is respect. What has
to do with the difference, what has

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to do with assuming that we are
not all equal, that we do not

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all have the same tastes, that
we do not all like the same.

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It' s that simple. Please, when you learn this you are able

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to build a family that helps,
what drives, what accompanies, what supports.

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The third key, or the third
habit, is to be clear on

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responsibilities. We must assign responsibilities as
well as ask for freedom, as well

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as ask for the possibility of making
our own decisions. We also need to

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know what our duties are, what
our responsibilities are. I' m thinking

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that many times dads, for example, don' t teach their kids responsibilities

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and they think they love them.
It is to make them irresponsible emperor monarchs

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who all have it and who must
answer nothing. You have to be very

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careful with that. I ask,
I demand, I have rights, but

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I also have duties and responsibilities.
They have to be assigned and they have

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to be very explicit and everyone has
to assume them in order to move forward.

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Another habit, the physical encounter.
I understand the digital connection, I

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understand the networks, I understand everything
technology brings us. But it is necessary

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to meet, it is necessary to
look us in the eyes, it is

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necessary to touch us, it is
necessary to caress us, It is necessary

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that there be a hug, that
there is a beautiful word, that touches

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the soul, that touches the life
of the other person. Please, we

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need those meetings then where we sit
at the table to eat a zancoche,

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if it were the Colombian Caribbean.
Or I don' t know if it

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' s a dinner, or I
don' t know if it' s

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a birthday party, but moments to
share, for those forum spaces where we

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express what we' re living in, where we say what' s in

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our heart. Physical experiences, physical
encounters are very important, because if we

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do not end up distancing ourselves,
sometimes we end up very connected, but

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very distant. I like it when
some say that technology connects us but sometimes

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it doesn' t allow us to
meet. And then that' s a

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point to keep in mind. And
one last, one last habit is that

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of spiritual experiences. I believe in
the power of spirituality, in that ability

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to connect us from values, from
meaning, from meanings, from the sublime,

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from transcendent, that gathering us together
to wish us the best, that

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gathering together to accompany us in a
transcendent dimension, in a dimension of love,

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in a dimension that goes beyond what
is useful, that goes beyond the

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pragmatic, that goes beyond what we
are able to do or have. That

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is why it is important that there
are spiritual practices that have to do with

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the existential rites that we have,
which have to do with the celebratory moments

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of life. Sometimes they go through
religious experiences, sometimes they don' t,

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because if religion divides, it can' t be a habit to keep

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in mind. If religion causes problems
between us, the members of the family,

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we have to be careful, because
the truth, I believe that the

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love of the family is worth more
than any dogma, it is worth more

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than any religious experience raised in such
or such a way that I put those

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habits through them. Understand who your
family is Take care of your family Don

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' t forget. Happiness is determined
by the quality of the bonds and you

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deserve to have healthy links, links
in which you feel, which add value,

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which they bring to you, which
they care for you and which give

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you affection. That' s fundamental
to living. I keep recommending to them

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the orational El Man is alive.
I keep recommending the book The Man is

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alive and is with you, and
I keep inviting you to be sharing these

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simple reflections, those reflections that seek
to connect and push you forward. Thanks

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for being there. We' re
in Apple, we' re in Amazon,

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we' re in desert, we' re in Spotify. You know.